Now, I know it's wrong, but I have to admit that I kept the speed up pretty good on that long drive. But, I had a system for not getting caught. At the mouth of the Gorge, the name of the area that the Columbia River had gouged out of the mountains on its way to the Pacific, I would wait for someone to go barreling past me. Then I would speed up and keep up that pace about fifty yards behind the speeder. The thought was that this person would get all the tickets for me and then I was free to hot rod my way through the Gorge.
The problem with this approach was that I got very used to traveling pretty fast. When that person turned off the freeway, I would just keep right on my whizzing way. Eventually I would notice that I was speeding, and then slow down. Then I would creep right back up to speed, notice I was speeding and slow down. Then I would creep right back up. It was a vicious cycle.
I was stuck in this loop of fast and slow when I came around this long gentle corner on the I-84, and I just happened to be at the top end of the cycle, when a highway patrol officer came into view.I physically jumped in my seat as if someone had snuck up behind me and grabbed my sides and yelled "Boom!" in my ear.
The cop was not startled. He was standing next to his car. He was looking at me. He was holding a radar gun. Next he was waving me to pull over next to him.
Busted!
And I knew it. I had totally been blowing it. I had been doing it all my way without a care in the world. No worries. No fear. Just cookin'. Until that corner when I came face to face with that radar gun that exposed it all. I wanted to stop the vehicle,slam on my brakes, become invisible. That is an awful feeling knowing I just got nailed by the law because I was guilty.
I think this is what it must be like if we were to come face to face with God, only worse. Think about it. God who is all holy. The maker of the law. Definer of all that is good or evil. If we were to come around a corner and see God standing there, it would be a major whoooooa! In that moment, when our eyes met, and we see the ultimate in holy, and we suddenly see how not holy we are, that would be completely unnerving.
There would be no high fives. I wouldn't break out in fits of laughter. Nor would I ask a question about some past event. You wouldn't here me break into song. Dancing would not ensue.
More than likely the sight of such pure holiness, awesome glory, terrifyingly raw power, and a majesty beyond description would make the brakes come screeching on. I wouldn't crumble to my knees. I wouldn't even land on my hands and knees. It would be a face plant. I would fall flat out like I were absolutely stone dead.
Why do I think this? Mostly because this is the kind of results we read when people have a God encounter. John the apostle said that when he was seeing a vision of heaven and God he "fell at his feet as though dead." (Revelation 1:17) It was all far too much for John. When Ezekiel saw the glory of the Lord, he said, "When I saw it, I fell facedown".(Ezekiel 1:28) Even Daniel who stood fearless in the face of hungry lions, said that he "was terrified and fell prostrate" when he had a heavenly vision. (Daniel 8:17)
God is amazingly, stunningly, and terrifyingly awesome.
And I am not.
I am far from. I sin. I do so thinking I've got the system figured out- just don't be as bad as the guy in front of me. I'm aaaaall gooood. For now...
One day we will stand before this God that the mere sight of causes even the holiest among us to crumble. I think that is why Paul told us that we ought to "continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling". Keep working at the relationship with God. Keep pressing on. That day will come suddenly, and I want desperately to not just being better than the guy in front of me. I want to be caught working at it, not working the system. Otherwise, I'll just be busted.
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